2016 Resolutions Re-Visited

Hey blog world - it's been a while. Normally this is the point where I apologize profusely and give lots of excuses on why I didn't write. I had a lot of excuses too - planning a wedding, travel, family illness, burnout.... but the truth is... I did write, a lot. I have so many drafts saved.... but I felt really self conscious and got the feeling that I didn't have any place to stand on a pedal-stool and give my opinions on things because I don't have it all figured out and most of the time I'm really really not sure of things myself - so I decided to not post the posts I'd written and to not write the things in my head or share the opinions I was creating. I'd go on long walks or runs (aka thinking time) and draft blog posts in my head.... and not do anything with them. I'd try out a new gadget I'd bought or received and think about how amazing it was (or wasn't) and want to tell someone... but not. Eventually, I decided that maybe it was good to at least circle back to my annual resolution posts, even if they were a little late.

And for my insecurities? They're still there. Some have worked themselves out through time or patience (not my strengths but I'm working on it) or just brutally throwing myself into any other passion within reach. Others are still forcefully there but they kind of came to a head this weekend with two friendships I was feeling a little disconnected from. One responded to me with coldness and bluntness and the other said "Why didn't you just tell me how you felt?" It always sucks to have your feelings disregarded but the bright side is that everyone is different and while someone might hurt you, someone else will show you kindness that reminds you why you do this and why you want to keep writing your blog even if you feel insecure sometimes.

So back to the main event - New Years Resolutions!!!! Looking at the list from last year is kind of a wonderful thing. While 2016 was a terrible year for most, it was the year I got married and bought a house and I will always remember the good that came from it. It was also the year I knocked off the most off my resolution list. While I can't give myself a 100% because a lot of the items weren't "all or nothing" - I have to admit, I didn't fail any of the items either. I had some missteps but in the end it all came out ok.

Here goes...

Not Be a Bridezilla

Well, I had my moments. I feel like I burned some of my Bridezilla-ing early on and it showed me I need to keep my cool and be more understanding. Looking back, I wish I hadn't over re-acted early on because it just made for some tough patches with friends and in the big picture, it all worked out ok. I think the hardest part about weddings is that it's not always obvious what's a huge deal and what's a little deal and it makes everything seem really huge. Spoiler alert big deal stuff is: family, groom, and marriage license showing up. Yea, food and clothes and alcohol are important too but you can get married without them. After that cheetahs and people having fun. Lastly, things looking nice. Everything else is a cherry on top. Spoiler again - the stuff I got mad about didn't even make that list. I'm an idiot sometimes.

 I still had some stressful moments later but I think I kept a better perspective as it got closer to the wedding and my priorities changed. Everything ended up looking amazing and all important people were accounted for. Our guests had a great time, we have amazing memories and pictures, and mostly, I got a pretty great husband out of the deal. I give this resolution a C.

Maintain or Gain

This one may seem a little weird. I wanted to make sure I didn't lose any more body mass last year. I wanted to either stay the same weight or build muscle. I've always wanted to be a strong girl and I think I'm above average but I wanted to push it last year. The wedding really side-lined my workout plans but afterwards, I became a more regular fixture at the climbing gym and at Body Pump class. I eventually added in some cardio (in the form of dog walks and runs so that the benefit can extend to another). I did two obstacle races at the end of the year that I strongly out-performed my past self in and have several more lined up for this year. All in all, I'm definitely stronger than I was this time last year and I'm moving more towards a fit physique than a skinny one.

My plan for this year to add in a weekly yoga class by my friend Lindsey (who also sells amazing natural products) as well and keep taking any opportunity to head outdoors with the dog for a walk, run, or hike. That will put my at something like 7-10 workouts per week. It might sound intense but since I didn't nail this goal in 2016, I definitely will this year. I give this one a B+

Start a Passive Income Business

My Etsy shop has been rocking! I really wanted to add some more patterns and things to my shop so I could just make money without doing much. I found that the hardest part of making patterns was finding good images to convert so whenever I wanted a distraction, I would just look for cool images to use. I also figured out how to use the Etsy advertising and while it's costing me a little bit, it's bringing in so many sales that it's totally worth it. It's gotten to the point where I sell a few patterns a week and I'd love to work on boosting that even more so that the income is enough to supplement the extra expenses we have now that we are homeowners. And if it's not that much - it would be fun to move it to own's account and use whatever's in it at the end of the year to splurge on an expensive treat like a fancy night out.

I've also been working on starting an active income business because I realized the only way to get rich is to really work for myself. However, those plans took a side line for wedding planning and house buying but 2017 is definitely the year to tackle that. I don't want to get to much into it but look for more later this year. This one gets an A-.

P.S. Look at this picture compared to where it was last year!!!! I didn't have a ton of time to stitch this year, and a lot of it was spent making a gift for a friend but the comparison is AMAZING. It will probably take me ten years to finish this but I should just post a picture a year so I can track my progress.

MexiCAN

WE FINALLY WENT TO MEXICO!!! We wanted something really relaxing and not super expensive after our wedding. I think some people call this kind of a trip a honeymoon but we keep telling ourselves that our trip to Europe this year is our Honeymoon... I digress.

Mexico was incredible. We went to an all-inclusive resort in San Jose del Cabo and it was amazing. We did an activity in the morning like bike riding or archery or shooting or swimming with dolphins (wait, what?) and then relaxed by the pool and ate all the food all afternoon. Oh you want to know about the dolphin thing? Well, Dan won the shooting competition and won BOGO dolphin swimming passes. That was more than enough to persuade us so we got to live that dream!

I know an all-inclusive resort isn't real Mexico but we got to the country, we spoke Spanish (even Dan said a few words!), we saw some beautiful sites, we drank a lot, and we swam with dolphins (I'm not going to let that go). I've been wanting to cross the San Diego border into TJ this year and I REALLY want to take a little road trip to Ensenada. Some friends keep suggesting it and I keep responding very affirmatively so I think we'll be making that happen. This resolution gets an A.

Watch My Temper

I will probably always be working on this one. If you read the Bridezilla section of this one, than you know I obviously didn't ace this one. This feels like the kind of thing that will be a growth project for me my whole life and I can only take it situation by situation. As I talked about in the intro to this post, I felt really self conscious after the wedding last year. The reasons were normally things that I would have gotten really mad about and sent some angry texts. Instead I kept it mostly to myself. I'd broach it a little with Dan or some outside friends (because another thing I've been working on is not gossiping as much, at least not to friends of the people involved) and it seemed like something that would work itself out. Months later when the issue seemed to be getting worse instead of better, I finally decided to stand up for myself. I'm sure it didn't go well but I'm happy I gave myself months to think about it instead of just snapping like I did other times this year.

The most important thing I've learned from this one - most of the time I'm overreacting and I just need to be more patient or understanding and it's better to be the bigger person and give it another shot. However - some of the time, you've rolled over one too many times and you need to stand up for yourself because patient and understanding or not - YOU ARE A PERSON WITH FEELINGS and maybe those feelings are little more sensitive and maybe you have a bad temper but you still deserve to be treated with respect. I give this one a B because holy fuck I came really far by the end of the year.

Keep It All About Balance

This was the shining light of my year. In a year full of craziness in the world, craziness in my life, and the usual craziness of just living in my head... I think I'm getting really close to this balance thing. The whole trying to be angry less and work out more - they're kind of a perfect partnership. When I was feeling left out and insecure and self conscious - I threw all of that energy into working out more and reading more and immersing myself into some of my passions. I created a workout schedule that is as good as having plans. Some of that workout schedule involves working out with friends who keep me accountable for showing up and yes, one of those friends is my dog. I reached out to other groups of friends and have connected more with them. I picked up from my book club hiatus with a stronger passion than ever for my group. I joined some new meetups that reflect the direction I want my life to be heading in. I played a video game for the first time in a year and half or so. I'm finding that when I feel disconnected from people, maybe it's good to focus that time on my husband, my pets, and mostly, me. I give this one an A because as the most subjective of the resolutions, and one that probably no one ever gets perfect, I feel really good about where I am.

And that's our lead in for 2017....