I'm actually a very goal oriented person so that's an important point to touch on when before we get going. It's why making a resolution list has been a big thing for me every year and why I like sharing it here. Even though I didn't set out the year with a set of goals, I ended up making some along the way because I knew it would help motivate me in a way that other things just don't.
Here are some of the things I accomplished in 2019:
- Signing up for a 10k shortly after giving birth and set (and completed!) a lot of goals around the training and completing of that race.
- Breastfeeding. Once we realized I was capable of it, holding onto that goal got me through the challenges of making it work well for us (now it's the easiest thing!).
- Planning out what meals I was going to make for the week. This helped me plan out what to grab from the freezer (since most of our protein comes frozen from Buthcerbox, it requires some planning ahead), as well as planning more complicated dishes when Dan was home to help with baby and having leftovers when he wasn't).
- Multitasking! This was HUGE after baby was born. I've always been good at multitasking but getting things done with a small baby was another level. Eventually we figured out how to get things done while watching Brooke. Somethings are easy to do when she can play on her mat and some things I can do while she's napping and some things just need to wait until she goes to bed or Dan is home. Figuring that out helped so much with getting things done.
Some people hate New Years Resolutions but I love them. I love the chance to look back on my year (or life!) and think, "what do I want to do better?" I'm in such a great place for that. With an almost 6 month old, I have a better idea of what motherhood is about and what are realistic goals for how much time I have in a day. I've spent the last month or so thinking about good goals that fit into my life and the life I'd like to have and I'm really excited about this list.
One last thing - this list revolves a lot around goal setting and what works for me. I've been doing this serious resolution list for like 12 years and I've learned a lot about what motivates me. Those things are: achieving a goal, rewarding myself, and competition. The best competition I've found has been against past Nikki. I'll crush her any chance I get. If you find yourself hating resolutions, maybe turn it around and figure out what motivates you. Everyone is different but we can all do great things.
Exercise More!
If you read this blog, it's no surprise that fitness is a big part of my life. Not being able to exercise to the same extent is one thing I really disliked about being pregnant and the postpartum journey. Once I got cleared to workout, I did a great job. I eased into exercise and then ramped it up in preparation for my race.
So I need a plan to get back into a fitness routine... and I have one! First, no wine unless I've worked out that day. It can literally be anything - a walk, a 15 min yoga video, ANYTHING. The point is just to get moving and to reward myself for getting back on that.
Second, train with a purpose! I am way more likely to take my fitness seriously if I have something to train for and I do. I signed up for a short Spartan race in the early spring and a half marathon at the end of May. I'm excited to train for these and get back into racing.
Third, get on a schedule. I've found the hardest part of having a baby isn't changing a diaper or any of the daily tasks, it's that I don't have the freedom to just do things at my convenience. I either need Dan to be home to watch her or I need to take her with me (which doesn't really work with a daycare-less gym). I'd like to work on a combo of things: going to the gym in the morning more when Dan is around to watch Brooke, working out with my videos and equipment at home while she's playing, and trying out the daycare at the YMCA (a membership I've been paying for months and haven't gone since 9 months pregnant). Brooke will also be big enough to ride in the running stroller which is a big part of my half marathon training plan. If I can take her running along a bike path during the day when it's safe, that will be huge in getting my fitness back on track and I'm sure she'll like the view.
As tempting as it is, this goal isn't about weight loss. I do have a goal of remaining baby weight I'd like to lose but if the year ends and I've worked out most days and weigh the same, I'll feel pretty good. It's also not about dieting. I threw around the idea of doing a January Whole30 because I know it works I'd probably easily knock out ten pounds if I did. However, I ultimately decided not to for two reasons. 1) As a breastfeeding Mom, my proiority is feeding my baby. Right now what I'm eating has helped me have a great milk supply so why mess with that? 2) Being a mom can be really hard and full of sacrifices. I don't want to add food as another thing I can't have right now. I also don't think we necessarily eat bad but I also don't deny myself some chocolate snacks or rich cheeses. I love food and I'd like to keep that simple pleasure right now.
Grow My Etsy Shop
A couple of years ago, I had a goal of making some passive income. I made an Etsy shop full of cross stitch downloads and it's done alright. I've basically stopped adding patterns to it since mid-2018 but the ones that are in there sell pretty well. It's not a large amount of money coming in or anything, but maybe it could be? I'd like to get patterns up on the site more regularly. I'm not going to set a strict goal because it's easier to do a bunch of patterns at once, but if I could keep my shop current with new pop culture trends (I'm looking at you Baby Yoda!), it will keep doing business in the background.
Upgrade
This one makes me feel a little greedy but, Dan and I are looking into getting a bigger house. We're so lucky to already own a home, but we always knew when we bought it that it wasn't our forever home. Having a baby has definitely made a big impact on the amount of space we have, but so has the loss of my mom. The latter has meant that holidays are spent at our home which just isn't really big enough to host a large dinner party next to the Christmas tree that takes up half our living room. As someone who love to cook, I feel limited by the amount of counter space I have to work with and usually I'm overflowing onto the dining and coffee tables to have enough prep space. It's definitely a little bit of a selfish problem to have but when we realized that we might be ready for a new house, why stay in a space we're not totally happy with?
We'd like our next home to be our basically forever home. By that, I mean someplace we'd like to stay unless outstanding circumstances changed things aka we win the lottery and can buy our absolute dream home. We've started looking and thought a lot about what we really want out of our next house which means we're not in any rush but getting something new in the next year would be ideal.
It's also really scary thinking about buying a new house though. Buying AND selling at the same time means timing needs to be perfect which can be tough in a competitive San Diego market. I'm also wary of the economy right now. I'm hoping that things work out well for us, but I always like to be cautious about making big moves.
De-Clutter
The older I get, the less interested I am in stuff. I have a lot of knick knacks that just take up space and are a pain in the butt to move. I think I'm pretty attached to what I have already and I've worked on not accumulating more stuff in the past year....
...but if we're going to move, it's definitely important to thin out what we have. While the idea of getting a bigger house is to have more space, I don't want us to be hermit crabs instantly filling that space with a ton of stuff. I'd love for more space to mean more open space. One thing I dislike about this house is how small the rooms are. This was made really evident when we brought the baby home and having her bassinet in our room meant we couldn't open our closet. It made me realize how nice it is just to have some open space in your house and I'd rather have that than lots of objects lying around.
I know I can clear out a ton of clothes. Becoming a mom means a big lifestyle change and also just some things I've had forever and will likely not wear anymore. I also need to take a serious think about the things I hold onto. I have a lot of things from my mom that hold a lot of sentimental value but are not useful (like shoes that don't fit me). Is the sentiment worth keeping things I can't use? Can I thin it to some pairs I saw her wear instead of keeping every pair I thought looked nice? On a similar vein, I have a TON of craft stuff from well meaning projects I never finished and sometimes never even started. Will I realistically do any of these? What would I need to be able to do these projects? A different space? (potentially solvable) More time? (a little trickier) A different life? (unlikely to work)
In the next couple of months, I want to do a huge clear out and really think what definitely needs to go and what we might want in our new home. I don't want to bring things just because we'll have more space but because I think we would use the things if the layout of our house gave us easier access to it (e.g. being able to have a dedicated gym space so it's easy to workout instead of having to set up a bunch of equipment each time, a good place to work on crafts projects).
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| Excited to use these trackers from Elise Joy to stay motivated. Yes, filling in a bubble is motivating to me. |
Complete a Big Craft Project
Speaking of those crafts... one thing that would help me justify keeping all those supplies would be a finishing a big craft project. Ideally it would be something I already have the supplies for. It's probably not going to be my big Batman Cross Stitch but maybe a smaller one for Brooke? Or a Halloween costume for her? I have so many supplies and I'm trying to balance baby with things I like to do so this will be a good test of that.
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| Probably not this (and yes it looks finished but this is like 1/10th of the final image) |
Be Reliable
Having a kid this past year has taught me a lot about reliability. Like I said above, the hardest thing about having a child is that you lose the freedom to just go where you want, when you want. You need to have a plan for everything - a plan for someone to watch the baby or a plan for bringing the baby that revolves around their diaper changes, feedings, and naps. It's tricky.
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| but they missed out on visiting this |
Those two things combined, made me realize that I don't want to be that person to someone else. I know I've told friends with babies that I would go visit and didn't. I've made plans and then changed my mind because it was inconvenient. I see now how crappy that is for the other person and I want to be better. It's something I've been working on for the last few months, but I want to keep the notion in my head when I decide to commit to something.
I do want to add the exception of the baby though. I definitely understand that I'm not always going to be on time for things because that's not how babies work. I also know that I might have all of the best intentions of doing something and she might get sick. Those are reasonable exceptions though and the spirit of the resolution is still good.
And Life...
I always have a few things up my sleeve that I don't put here either because it's just for me or because it doesn't make sense as a goal. In the past, I've had resolutions like "be nicer" but when you can't quantify something, it's hard to know if you did it well. Yes, there are things I'd like to do like "be more present" or "have more patience" but I can work on that constantly without making it into a list item to check off. Plus, I think accomplishing the 6 goals above will be a big improvement on our daily lives.
So that's the plan for 2020! Also, I have soooo many blog posts that are partially or mostly done and just need some tidying up before I post. I am constantly thinking of things that I want to write but the times that I have ideas and the times I have free to write aren't always the same. Hopefully that will get better next year but maybe not. I'm not going to make a promise I can't keep but I can try to get some of those posts out.
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