This may be the only post that goes out of order, but I like to write them as they come sometimes and I don't want to post this one a few months from now. This post will only be relevant today. This post is about growing up.
Today was my 25th birthday. I always pictured my life at 25 and without going into too much detail - I thought my life would be much different than it is. I've spent so many birthdays trying to make everything perfect - throw the perfect party, have everyone show up, feel popular and be at the "right place" in my life. I don't have any of that at 25 and I've never felt more content with where I am.
I live in one of the most beautiful cities in the world, I have a job that allows me to live a very comfortable lifestyle, but most importantly I am surrounded by great friends and family. I spent so many birthdays trying to get everyone to come to my birthday parties, to plan something that would make everyone happy, and I was always the one unsatisfied. This year, I am spending my birthday the way I want to. The people that care about me will and have been there for me. If someone can't make it, that doesn't mean they don't care. If someone doesn't care, forget 'em. I will always be inviting and a hostess (its in my nature, you should see the rest of my family), but I'm not going to take things so personally.
My life is far from perfect but it's a really good one. I'm finally in a place where I know that I need to make myself happy before I can expect anyone else to. It took 25 years but in think I'm finally growing up.
good to see that you're old/wise enough not to concern yourself with attaining "perfection"
ReplyDeleteyour blog is a testament to the chase of perfection and you will be happy to find the chase will lead to catching excellence again and again
cheers to 25 more, and hopefully 25 more (and change) after that
but please never grow up, that's what I like best about you
"at the crossroads
i wander by the side of hachiman shrine
talking with some children.
last year, a foolish monk;
this year, no change!"
Taigu Ryokan (1758-1831 / Japan)
Thanks Casey - don't worry, I'm still going to be a smart mouthed, brat. It's going to be a long time before I grow out of THAT. I'm just growing out of getting upset over things that don't matter. I'm realizing that I have enough wonderful people in my life that I don't need to worry about the people that constantly let me down. Sometimes it's just not worth it.
ReplyDeleteOne day at a time, Nicole. You are growing well beyond this, I just don't think you see it all.
ReplyDeleteBut happiness is most certainly a beautiful place to start.
Happy birthday...